Me? Snowblindness?
All of my best friends nickname me gwei-mui (white or western girl) even though I am 100% Chinese, born and raised in Hong Kong. Number 1- I don't act white and I don't even want to be white (especially in a town where yellow fever is highly contiguous). However, apart from my first puppy love boyfriend when I was 13, I have never dated any other Chinese guys.
Since entering university, I've dated Spanish, Italian, French, British, (Mexican, African and Caucasian) Americans, Danish, Swedish, even Ghanaian. Just no Chinese. My friends guess that I am never going to any Chinese guys in Hong Kong. People who don't know me well see my white boys come and go (can't they see the Mediterranean olive and the dark chocolate color in the mix?) - and they call it snowblindness! I wonder why - not kidding - I do.
First of all, how come I am not dating any Chinese? This is a question many people have asked me and I am now asking myself too. Loads of girls complain that local boys are too much "Kong boys", a popular canton term which translates as local males who are stereotypically geeky, immature, dependent, and boring who stays at home playing computer games all the time.
White girlfriends (and the gay potato queens) who've had the experience complain that they are small - in two ways (you figure out which two). Whether the stereotypes are true or not, I have figured out that they are not the fundamental reason why I am not dating any Chinese guys. I don't even meet them. They never show up in my social circle. From the not-so mainstream artsy events like gallery openings, indie band shows and literature festivals to the cliche as hell drinking activities in Soho and LKF on weekends, I just don't recall the last time seeing a local Chinese guy. (For the record I do see a lot of ABCs but I have also realized I am not a big fan of Americans so I believe it is not the Chinese side that stops me from dating them). If you do please let me know so I can go and try to date one to make my mom happy. Without having meet any I really can't even say that local Chinese guys are too "Kong boys" or small to date.
Perhaps Anita or someone else can write a story about dating a local Chinese man in town. Really, it sounds like a myth to me. While the local Chinese guys do not show up in my social circle, the expats do. I suppose, for that reason, I have an international record in my love resume. Among the expat community, I assume more than 80% of them are white. So the odds of meeting a male in galleries, indie concerts, or simply bars and restaurants in Soho and LKF who is white, is fairly high. It seems to me that my tendency to date white guys is simply a matter of math.
Do I just date any white guys? Am I blinded by their snowy white skin (which is often beautiful tanned)? I start to think about my ex-es. No, I guess I am more blinded by their poetic words, paintings, music and philosophy. It'd be lying to say I don't love their gorgeous face and body. Physical attraction does count. But having worked in the advertising industry and surrounded by pretty faces every day, I get numb. If I get hit on by a handsome model with no brain, I'd be so bored and fall asleep in the taxi-ride on the way home together.
Ok my past boyfriends are mostly white, call it cheesy, it's their personalities that attract me the most. They are writers, a novelists, DJ, musicians and NGO strategists who I can talk about Czech literatures and postmodern movies to, who I can argue about the recent politics with, and who enjoy my pick of rock concerts. Let me get it straight - I am not speaking for all the local Chinese girls here. I do see girls who just date any white guys. A lot actually. Just go to Beijing Club, Billion or even worse, Insomnia, and you will see hot young Chinese girls (and you can tell they aren't prostitutes) dating some ugly mid-aged men with just a tiny-wini bit of sugar (seriously, the real deals do not hangout in these clubs) and snow-white skin that blinds. And you think - she definitely deserves better. But I also know a lot of Chinese girls like me who just happen to date white guys because they enter our lives more frequently than guys of other races do in Hong Kong. Me? Snowblindness? I guess not.
By May D.
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Comments
"idiots date bitches, etc." LOL
and, nice and honest insight, Miss D. since when love has to do with the color of skin?
cheers
I get accused of having yellow fever too but I totally agree with your "mathematical reasoning". There are roughly 3.5 million Hong Kong girls versus 10,000-35,000 expat women?
I honestly have no idea how many expat women there are here, but the point is, even after you subtract all the Hong Kong women that don't speak passable English, there's still a lot more than there are expats. Even if you're equally attracted to the two, who do you think you're statistically more likely to meet in Hong Kong?
So yeah, it makes sense. You hang around Western people, eventually you date them. Teachers date other teachers, businessmen date businesswomen, idiots date bitches, etc.
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