Hip Hong Kong | For the Ladies: How to be Single in Hong Kong

It’s no myth that Hong Kong in all its glitzy splendor can be a daunting (or exciting, depending on how you look at it) place for the newly single or desperate girl. Before one realizes that everyone who goes out on a regular basis is somehow related to each other by at most 4 degrees, the city is a giant bag of candy. A man-dy store… so many options, so many flavors! After a while though, the thrill fades away. We start to go through the vicious cycle of meeting schmuck after schmuck. Life feels lonely after constantly meeting the same types of men (the non-committal, the rebound, the emotionally unavailable, the aloof schoolgirl crush, the untouchable ex of a mutual friend, etc. etc. ), and so continues the string of one-night stands, the strange pattern of short-lived non-relationships. The giant Pick’N’Mix is now an unfortunate Prick’N’Mix.

As a result, we single women suffer from our sensitive walls breaking down, revealing feelings of pessimism, why-me-ism, and overall bitterness. Being single always has a bad rep but in reality, it is nothing to be ashamed about! We all need to get in touch with our sexy single selves and relish it.

We all know it’s undeniably tough for pretty lone birds to resist the pressures of going out with the weekly events with free booze flying out at you like the automatic ball feeders in batting cages. Who ever said you have to hit at every single one! Instead of spending your precious time drinking your sorrows away only to numb yourself from the grubby outstretched fingers of Mike Moneypockets, however cute he might seem according to your Mojito-spiked vision, focus on your goals and make yourself a hotter commodity while you still can!

It is a PRIVILEGE for any man you spend time with to be having out with YOU. Own your shit! Love your body, work on it if you don’t. Cultivate yourself, hone your skills, get good at guitar again, or learn to make a killer flan. Surround yourself with only things and people that you like. If you don’t feel like a sexy mama, save up your money for a nice treatment at the spa, throw out all the clothes, jewelry, and makeup that you hate, send it off to Salvation Army, and splurge on that LBD you’ve been coveting for the past 3 months, yes the one that makes your body look like Cheryl Cole’s! Do it for yourself, not for your booty call Ricardo!

As for the man search… don’t be jaded and don’t give up! Get rid of all your expectations and preconceived notions about dating. Just have fun, keep it super casual! Easier said than done, but the more you let down your guard, the more interesting your conversations will be. Never deny the opportunity of meeting anyone even if they seem unattractive or lame. If this is the case, the key is to meet their friends!

Sleep with him, but only if you want to! For some reason, women tend to think that if they did it once, it’s not a big deal if it happens again, even if he has a small penis AND is greedy in bed. Soon, it becomes an automatic slippery slope of regrets every time henceforth. Hello? What happened to the pussy power? Just because it happened once, does NOT mean it has to happen again! I’ve been down this path more times than I can count and I think by the 3rd morning after pill in 2 weeks I shook myself awake and slapped myself across the face.

Now if I am in need of attention I will go home with a good-looking man but control my sexual urges because I know how it affects me emotionally. Usually this ends up with me naked (hey, it’s summer!), and him with a black eye if he tries to take advantage of the easy access.

But don’t get me wrong about having decent standards, I’m all for making out and having intimate moments in the nude with sexy, pseudo-intelligent dudes (a big plus if they know how to read !) However, when you get into this situation, make sure to keep yourself from getting locked in! Flaunt all you’ve got and flirt your bum off but then make sure you close the door tightly behind you when you leave. If he likes you, he will call you, but do not impatiently check your phone every 5 minutes and especially do not take the initiative to call/text him FIRST! You are a woman- let him woo you! And if he doesn’t, NEXT! No big deal, just didn’t work out. If you had any doubts, it probably means you were hesitating on settling anyways. Girlfriend, lukewarm feelings aren’t good enough! When you click with someone, everything will just feel completely natural.

That being said, enjoy the time having youthful skin and being able to bone whoever you want. Pretty soon we will all be reminiscing about the days when we had firm curvaceous behinds and perky boobs. Remember, dating is a myth. All dating rules are meant to be broken but your self-respect is not. Now go blow-dry your hair, put on some heels and do your thang, you wild stallion!